Okay, I love television. I am addicted to it. I would not be able to go one week without television. Oprah has challenged peeps to do this in order to save on their carbon footprint, but I wear a size 8 and that's not much of a footprint. :`).
I adore the new Orbitz "Dirty Mouth" commercials! The ones where they 'clean up' the dirty words. "That's one bad micky ficky" was the first one that dawned on me. The first few times I saw the commercials, I did not catch what the people sitting around were doing. I was focused on the new packaging (quite snazzy and almost tie-dyed looking) and usually am watching DVR'd programs where I can just fly through the commercials, and I can't always understand that British accent - blame that on Gordon Ramsey because his yelling on Hell's Kitchen has totally turned me off of accents for awhile now. Although, I did enjoy the English accents in Las Vegas during the World Cup match between USA and UK. There were guys wearing the ENTIRE soccer a.k.a futbol uniforms, including knee socks and white shoes!! If our male fans start wearing capri leggings with their Cowboys or Packers or Steelers jerseys, we are in a world of hurt.....but I digress.
I laugh hysterically every time I see those commercials. I need to find them on the Internet to play during the day when I need some comedic relief and when I need some new replacement words. :`).
*Side Note: I don't fast-forward through the Sonic commercials, either. They are way too entertaining!
**Side, Side Note: How many women is Don Draper going to sleep with?? Now it's his secretary and his pretend-marriage daughter. UG!
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
TMI
Warning: This post is NOT in reference to my friends. It is simply an observation of the public at-large.
Let’s discuss TMI – TOO MUCH INFORMATION. I must have a face that says “Please, please, tell me your deepest, darkest secrets” because I fall victim to TMI more times than I can count. I catch it more often than strepp throat. I blame texting and IM’ing. I think people are less “face time” connected and feel it is easier to share it all via text and IM. I don’t need to hear about your rashes, your allergies, your midnight escapades, your cramping (yes, it is okay to share amongst the closest of friends…..), your intestinal issues; the list goes on and on.
Be kind to your neighbor; don’t share too much! Be selective on what information you share and with whom you share information. Once words are said/typed, images come to mind. These images are then forever emblazoned upon the brain to then pop up at the most unwanted and inappropriate times! If I don’t know you well, I really don’t want to hear about skin conditions or diseases or how unkempt your pool is or therapy experiences. And, even though this seems unrelated, public scratching falls into my definition of TMI. I don’t want to see you scratching!! Get some lotion or something………
I blame Oprah. We all feel empowered to share everything now and that’s not always a good thing. As in creative writing: KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE. Compose yourself and control yourself on the sharing. TMI can be harmful to the receiver.
*As a note to the 'emblazoned on the brain' part, I don't need your icky images in my brain cells IF/WHEN my brain is played back to me in Heaven. I have this feeling (call it memories of cartoons as a kid or all those chain emails over the years) that on my day of judgement, God [or St. Peter] will replay all of my actions and I'll be held accountable for said actions. I sure don't need any more negative baggage in my brain!
Let’s discuss TMI – TOO MUCH INFORMATION. I must have a face that says “Please, please, tell me your deepest, darkest secrets” because I fall victim to TMI more times than I can count. I catch it more often than strepp throat. I blame texting and IM’ing. I think people are less “face time” connected and feel it is easier to share it all via text and IM. I don’t need to hear about your rashes, your allergies, your midnight escapades, your cramping (yes, it is okay to share amongst the closest of friends…..), your intestinal issues; the list goes on and on.
Be kind to your neighbor; don’t share too much! Be selective on what information you share and with whom you share information. Once words are said/typed, images come to mind. These images are then forever emblazoned upon the brain to then pop up at the most unwanted and inappropriate times! If I don’t know you well, I really don’t want to hear about skin conditions or diseases or how unkempt your pool is or therapy experiences. And, even though this seems unrelated, public scratching falls into my definition of TMI. I don’t want to see you scratching!! Get some lotion or something………
I blame Oprah. We all feel empowered to share everything now and that’s not always a good thing. As in creative writing: KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE. Compose yourself and control yourself on the sharing. TMI can be harmful to the receiver.
*As a note to the 'emblazoned on the brain' part, I don't need your icky images in my brain cells IF/WHEN my brain is played back to me in Heaven. I have this feeling (call it memories of cartoons as a kid or all those chain emails over the years) that on my day of judgement, God [or St. Peter] will replay all of my actions and I'll be held accountable for said actions. I sure don't need any more negative baggage in my brain!
Apple Etiquette
Today I would like to cover the etiquette of eating an apple in public.
Please, for the love of God, do not eat a whole apple in public. To be more clear, do not eat an unsliced apple in public. No one wants to see you chomping and slurping while trying to get in one of your nine fruits & veggies for the day. If you insist on eating fresh fruit (canned is much more suited to public consumption), be sure to do your peeling and slicing and dicing out of the public spectrum. That way, when it is time to consume your fruit, it will not be annoying.
Apples are as bad as chips. They are LOUD. YOU are LOUD when you are eating an apple. I am certain that pears fall into this category as well, but few people openly munch on whole pears in public. Looks like the Pear Institute did their marketing correctly!
Be aware of your surroundings and do not continue to torture your workmates, schoolmates, picnic-mates, mass-transit-mates……you get the drift.
Now that you know to cut your apple into slices before consumption, be sure to have the good sense that your mama gave you to NOT TALK WITH YOUR MOUTH FULL. Seriously?? Grown-ups are supposed to know better. Trust me, nothing you have to say other than “I am bleeding, I am having a baby, or I am choking” is important enough for you to talk with food in your mouth.
Practice apple etiquette and make everyone's day a nicer experience.
Please, for the love of God, do not eat a whole apple in public. To be more clear, do not eat an unsliced apple in public. No one wants to see you chomping and slurping while trying to get in one of your nine fruits & veggies for the day. If you insist on eating fresh fruit (canned is much more suited to public consumption), be sure to do your peeling and slicing and dicing out of the public spectrum. That way, when it is time to consume your fruit, it will not be annoying.
Apples are as bad as chips. They are LOUD. YOU are LOUD when you are eating an apple. I am certain that pears fall into this category as well, but few people openly munch on whole pears in public. Looks like the Pear Institute did their marketing correctly!
Be aware of your surroundings and do not continue to torture your workmates, schoolmates, picnic-mates, mass-transit-mates……you get the drift.
Now that you know to cut your apple into slices before consumption, be sure to have the good sense that your mama gave you to NOT TALK WITH YOUR MOUTH FULL. Seriously?? Grown-ups are supposed to know better. Trust me, nothing you have to say other than “I am bleeding, I am having a baby, or I am choking” is important enough for you to talk with food in your mouth.
Practice apple etiquette and make everyone's day a nicer experience.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
The Host
If you are running errands with a co-worker or a friend or some other random person where the store you are shopping at is your "regular" store, you are the HOST. Therefore, the key thing to do is to drive the cart. You know the store; they do not. This is imperative if you are on a time limit, such as lunch hour (not lunch two-hour.....) or are ADD or are not particularly fond of your shopping partner (this tends to be the case at the holidays....). Providing directions to someone who is not used to the store can be frustrating. And if they are easily distracted by "shiny objects" [picture Dory from 'Nemo' here], you will have a hard time keeping them on task. It is amazing how extra items appear in the cart at the checkout counter!
Oh, and if they do grab the cart first, you can try to take it back during the walk-through time, but this is not a guarantee of gaining control. Take control from the get-go! Worse-case, if you are non-confrontational, then practice GYOC: get your own cart. You can at least play "follow the leader" and be in and out as soon as possible.
You may be asking, "Why is this such an important thing?" Well, some of us are fast and efficient shoppers. We are not browsers. We like to take a list and get in & out ASAP. Browsing is for the days when the kids are at practice and it is too hot or too cold to sit and watch them (kids will tend to get annoyed and/or hurt by this, but it probably helps build character). Or when you are avoiding going home (insert your own reasons here) or are extremely early to a party because Mapquest told you it would take 42 minutes and you were there in 15...... Sorry, I digress.
Remember: BE THE HOST
Oh, and if they do grab the cart first, you can try to take it back during the walk-through time, but this is not a guarantee of gaining control. Take control from the get-go! Worse-case, if you are non-confrontational, then practice GYOC: get your own cart. You can at least play "follow the leader" and be in and out as soon as possible.
You may be asking, "Why is this such an important thing?" Well, some of us are fast and efficient shoppers. We are not browsers. We like to take a list and get in & out ASAP. Browsing is for the days when the kids are at practice and it is too hot or too cold to sit and watch them (kids will tend to get annoyed and/or hurt by this, but it probably helps build character). Or when you are avoiding going home (insert your own reasons here) or are extremely early to a party because Mapquest told you it would take 42 minutes and you were there in 15...... Sorry, I digress.
Remember: BE THE HOST
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